Sacko Bowl
Week 7 Recap
High Score-
Dickhead
(Boooo Hisssss)
153.7 pts
Sacko Civil War Update-
Olds: 3,844.7 pts
Youngs: 3,837.4 pts
I am DDoSing all over the place here with the company computers. GIF's are limited so you will get a copied and pasted "What Your Favorite NFL Team Says About You" stolen from The Chive and like it, but only for this week.
6.) #11 Sope Pro (1-5) 141.2 pts
GETS FIRST WIN EVER, EVER against
#8 Butt Fumbler (2-4) 96.2 pts
JR Says: 0 Barn Burners!
We did it everyone! Everyone has a W. Thanks to Big D Johnson laying some pipe last Monday night.
New York Jets Fans
You’re like that other girl in a Hollywood movie who sticks to the heels of the popular girl. You hate her, but without her you’re irrelevant. Well, there was that one time you wore that fur coat. Then again, there was that time you got wasted and kissed your sister in front of everyone.
5.) #2 Dickhead (5-1) 153.7 pts
Butters the bread of
#7 Larry Rocks (2-4) 114.3 pts
JR Says: 0 Barn Burners!
When Dickhead wins highest scorer, we all lose a little. This week the bad guys won.
New York Jets Fans
You’re like that other girl in a Hollywood movie who sticks to the heels of the popular girl. You hate her, but without her you’re irrelevant. Well, there was that one time you wore that fur coat. Then again, there was that time you got wasted and kissed your sister in front of everyone.
4.) #10 Lady Boy Jansson (2-4) 100.5 pts
Wh Wha Whattssss!?
#9 Polk High Panthers (2-4) 68.1 pts
JR Says: 0 Barn Burners!
It's times like these that we need to come together and help out our fellow Civil War teammates and throw them some extra players that you can't use for the greater good, its for the greater good of the Millennial Confederation! Even if you trade them overweight running backs destined for the IR.
When all else fails, GRAB THEM BY THE PUSSY!
3.) #5 Reverse Cow Girls (3-3) 96.4 pts
#12 Skipler (1-5) 90.5 pts
JR Says: 2 Barn Burners!
This is the shenanigans trade revisited 2 weeks later coming back to haunt Skipler as he continues his championship hangover. Can't talk too bad though because the last 2 champs of the league are in position for a Sacko Bowl sword fight.
https://fat.gfycat.com/PowerlessPerfumedInchworm.webm
New York Giants Fans
Ever heard the phrase sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good? Yeah, that’s you. You always manage to backslide into success somehow. As if that’s not annoying enough, why do you always look like you’re smelling something disgusting for the first time? Your friends jokingly refer to you as “dump face.”
Miami Dolphins
Surrounded by sexy young college co-eds, you find it hard to get any attention lately. You’ve had some great years, but every step forward seems to be followed by two in the wrong direction. You throw a hell of a party though.
2.) #1 Land of the Lost (6-0) 96.0 pts
Somehow still doesn't lose against
#4 Twatty (4-2) 90.8 pts
JR Says: 2 Barn Burners!
Where were these kind of perfomances for the first 5 weeks of the season for me!??
1.) #6 Suck my Clinton Dix (3-3) 84.1 pts
3 Barn Burns
#3 Mississippi Mud Butts (5-1) 81.3 pts
JR Says: 3 Barn burners!
I am getting sick and tired of the main events of the week being so goddamn low scoring. It is even more annoying than the goddamn DDOS but bah gawd is this an upset alert.
San Francisco 49ers Fans
The 80’s were absolutely gold for you. You could do no wrong. Then you got that makeover in the 90’s… You poured a lot of money into that makeover and it really looked good – for a year. The new millennium has made you its bitch. Perhaps worst of all is your boss who inherited the family business and has absolutely run it into the ground. To make matters worse, you’re on the NSA watch list.
